The smart way to catch Burglars

It was late and Charlie was about to climb into bed when his wife informed him that there was a light on in their garden shed. Charlie started to go outside to turn off the light but noticed some people in the shed who were busy stealing his things.

He ran back inside right away and called the cops, who asked him "Are there any intruders in your house?" to which Charlie replied no and explained his circumstances. The cops told Charlie that all patrol cars were otherwise occupied, and that he should just lock his door and a uniformed cop would be at his house when one was free.

Charlie answered, "Alright," hung up, waited 30 seconds, and then called the cops again.

"Hello, I just called a short while ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. I want to let you know that they're not a problem anymore because I've just shot every one of them."

Charlie then hung up the phone. In five short minutes, three patrol cars, a SWAT team, and an ambulance arrived, and Of course, the cops caught the burglars in the act.

One of the cops snapped at Charlie: "I thought you said that you shot every one of them!"

"I thought you said there were no patrol cars free!" Charlie answered.

Zoo Job

One day an out of work mime is visiting the zoo and attempts to earn some money as a street performer. As soon as he starts to draw a crowd, a zoo keeper grabs him and drags him into his office. The zoo keeper explains to the mime that the zoo's most popular attraction, a gorilla, has died suddenly and the keeper fears that attendance at the zoo will fall off.

He offers the mime a job to dress up as the gorilla until they can get another one. The mime accepts.

So the next morning the mime puts on the gorilla suit and enters the cage before the crowd comes. He discovers that it's a great job. He can sleep all he wants, play and make fun of people and he draws bigger crowds than he ever did as a mime. However, eventually the crowds tire of him and he tires of just swinging on tires. He begins to notice that the people are paying more attention to the lion in the cage next to his. Not wanting to lose the attention of his audience, he climbs to the top of his cage, crawls across a partition, and dangles from the top to the lion's cage. Of course, this makes the lion furious, but the crowd loves it.

At the end of the day the zoo keeper comes and gives the mime a raise for being such a good attraction. Well, this goes on for some time, the mime keeps taunting the lion, the crowds grow larger, and his salary keeps going up. Then one terrible day when he is dangling over the furious lion he slips and falls. The mime is terrified.

The lion gathers itself and prepares to pounce. The mime is so scared that he begins to run round and round the cage with the lion close behind. Finally, the mime starts screaming and yelling, "Help me, help me!", but the lion is quick and pounces. The mime soon finds himself flat on his back looking up at the angry lion and the lion says, "Shut up you idiot! Do you want to get us both fired?"

December 21 2012 Predictions – The End of The World 2012?

Until a couple of years ago there were not that many people who were acquainted with the end of the world 2012 prophecy that was put forward by many scholars who studied the end of the Mayan long calendar. This Long Count calendar has lasted for five thousand one hundred and twenty five years, and although the end of the calendar leads to many different interpretations, one of the most popular is the belief that at the end of this cycle the world (or humanity’s existence) will come to an abrupt end on December 21 2012. Is the world going to end in 2012?

In order to fully understand the 2012 end of the world predications, then you should first understand the calendar that is at the center of this controversy. The current cycle, or baktun, of this calendar began on August 13th, 3114 B.C. This marked the end of the last period and the beginning of the current one. The baktun that we are currently living in is the thirteenth, and the end of this cycle is one that has been considered to have a large level of importance to the Mayan people, which is why so many people have come to the conclusion that this cycle’s end is one that will mean the end of the world as we know it.

While there is no definite proclamation of how the end of the world 2012 predictions will happen, those who have studied this calendar claim that the long calendar was created in order to correspond with a long term astronomical prediction by the Mayan people. This has led some to believe that this end of the world scenario will play out in a manner that has something to do with something from beyond this world. While this correlation to something that is going on in outer space is not a definite thing, for some it comes from a basic understanding of Mayan culture and their unique understanding of astronomical phenomena and planetary alignments.

Global Warming

Global warming refers to the rising average temperature of Earth's atmosphere and oceans and its projected continuation. In the last 100 years, Earth's average surface temperature increased by about 0.8 °C (1.4 °F) with about two thirds of the increase occurring over just the last three decades. Warming of the climate system is unequivocal, and scientists are more than 90% certain most of it is caused by increasing concentrations of greenhouse gasesproduced by human activities such as deforestation and burning fossil fuels. These findings are recognized by the national science academies of all the major industrialized countries.

Climate model projections are summarized in the 2007 Fourth Assessment Report (AR4) by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC). They indicate that during the 21st century the global surface temperature is likely to rise a further 1.1 to 2.9 °C (2 to 5.2 °F) for their lowest emissions scenario and 2.4 to 6.4 °C (4.3 to 11.5 °F) for their highest. The ranges of these estimates arise from the use of models with differing sensitivity to greenhouse gas concentrations.

An increase in global temperature will cause sea levels to rise and will change the amount and pattern of precipitation, and a probable expansion ofsubtropical deserts.^[11] Warming is expected to be strongest in the Arctic and would be associated with continuing retreat of glaciers, permafrost and sea ice. Other likely effects of the warming include more frequent occurrence of extreme weather events including heat waves, droughts and heavy rainfall events,species extinctions due to shifting temperature regimes, and changes in crop yields. Warming and related changes will vary from region to region around the globe, with projections being more robust in some areas than others. In a 4 °C world^{[clarification needed]}, the limits for human adaptation are likely to be exceeded in many parts of the world, while the limits for adaptation for natural systems would largely be exceeded throughout the world. Hence, the ecosystem services upon which human livelihoods depend would not be preserved.

Most countries are parties to the United Nations Framework Convention on Climate Change (UNFCCC), whose ultimate objective is to prevent "dangerous" anthropogenic (i.e., human-induced) climate change. Parties to the UNFCCC have adopted a range of policies designed to reduce greenhouse gas emissions and to assist in adaptation to global warming. Parties to the UNFCCC have agreed that deep cuts in emissions are required, and that future global warming should be limited to below 2.0 °C (3.6 °F) relative to the pre-industrial level. 2011 analyses by the United Nations Environment Programme and International Energy Agency suggest that current efforts to reduce emissions may be inadequately stringent to meet the UNFCCC's 2 °C target.

Bisakah Bahasa Indonesia Menjadi Bahasa Ilmu Pengetahuan?

Bahasa Indonesia adalah bahasa resmi Republik Indonesia dan bahasa persatuan bangsa Indonesia.Bahasa Indonesia diresmikan penggunaannya setelah Proklamasi Kemerdekaan Indonesia, tepatnya sehari sesudahnya, bersamaan dengan mulai berlakunya konstitusi. DiTimor Leste, bahasa Indonesia berstatus sebagai bahasa kerja.

Dari sudut pandang linguistik, bahasa Indonesia adalah salah satu dari banyak ragam bahasa Melayu. Dasar yang dipakai adalah bahasa Melayu Riau (wilayah Kepulauan Riau sekarang) dari abad ke-19. Dalam perkembangannya ia mengalami perubahan akibat penggunaanya sebagai bahasa kerja di lingkungan administrasi kolonial dan berbagai proses pembakuan sejak awal abad ke-20. Penamaan "Bahasa Indonesia" diawali sejak dicanangkannya Sumpah Pemuda, 28 Oktober 1928, untuk menghindari kesan "imperialisme bahasa" apabila nama bahasa Melayu tetap digunakan. Proses ini menyebabkan berbedanya Bahasa Indonesia saat ini dari varian bahasa Melayu yang digunakan di Riau maupun Semenanjung Malaya. Hingga saat ini, Bahasa Indonesia merupakan bahasa yang hidup, yang terus menghasilkan kata-kata baru, baik melalui penciptaan maupun penyerapan dari bahasa daerah dan bahasa asing.

Meskipun dipahami dan dituturkan oleh lebih dari 90% warga Indonesia, Bahasa Indonesia bukanlah bahasa ibu bagi kebanyakan penuturnya. Sebagian besar warga Indonesia menggunakan salah satu dari 748 bahasa yang ada di Indonesia sebagai bahasa ibu Penutur Bahasa Indonesia kerap kali menggunakan versi sehari-hari (kolokial) dan/atau mencampuradukkan dengan dialek Melayu lainnya atau bahasa ibunya. Meskipun demikian, Bahasa Indonesia digunakan sangat luas di perguruan-perguruan, di media massa, sastra, perangkat lunak, surat-menyurat resmi, dan berbagai forum publik lainnya, sehingga dapatlah dikatakan bahwa Bahasa Indonesia digunakan oleh semua warga Indonesia.

Fonologi dan tata bahasa Bahasa Indonesia dianggap relatif mudah. Dasar-dasar yang penting untuk komunikasi dasar dapat dipelajari hanya dalam kurun waktu beberapa minggu.

Jingle otomotif

Scoopy “Uniqnely Happy”

          *Slogan ini menunjukkan bahwa motor Honda Scoopy itu adalah unik,dari bentuknya yang beda dari motor lain, yaitu mirip skuter .warna motornya pun ceria-ceria,Motor inni pun cocok untuk anak-anak muda.

Honda  “One Heart “

Aku maju dengan pasti meraih mimpik

           *Slogan ini mengatakan bahwa semua kalangan dari pria maupn wanita,dari semua umur ,cocok untuk menggunakan motor Honda.

Yamaha  “ No. 1 di Dunia “

            *Kenapa  dikatakan nomor  1 di dunia karena sudah terbukti kualitasnya, sesi kecepatan lebih tinggi dari motor lain. cc motor motor Yamaha lebih inikdari motor lain. CC nya 135 dan juga ada yang CC115 (metic), sedangkan CC motor lain umumnya hanya sampai 125 cc

Yamaha mio  ”Wanita jangan mau ketinggalan”

                *Yamaha mio  yang bentuknya kecil dan ramping khusus di peruntukkan untuk wanita,jadi tidak hanya laki-laki yang bisa naik motor,Wanita juga jangan mau ketinggalan.

Mitsubishi pajero sport  “ pa, kita rally yuk ”

               *maksudnya naik pajero dengan jalan yang mulus,atau jalan yang tidak mulus,bergelombang /berbatu-batu,semua pengendara pajero sport akan tetap merasa nyaman apapun medannya, karena pajero sport dilengkapi dengan berbagai macam keunggulan untuk mobil di era jaman sekarang ,seperti 4wd,ban racing,power steering dan berbagai interior yang menarik juga sangat cocok untuk mobil keluarga maupun pribadi.

Yamaha Vega   “  Menjawab semua impian “

       *Slogan ini menunjukan bahwa Yamaha Vega menjawab semua impian masyarakat yang mengharapkan motor dengan harga yang murah namun berkualitas, tidak hanya itu Yamaha Vega juga masuk disemua kalangan atas maupun kalangan bawah.

Dunlop “ Driving to the Future “

             *Ban Dunlop akan membawa kendaraan anda hingga ke masa depan, artinya Ban Dunlop akan selalu ada dan kuat sampai beberapa tahun kemudian.

Oli Top 1 Action Matic “ Top 1 Action Matic ! Jawara bilang enak ! “

            *Oli Top one Action Matic adalah oli yang paling bagus (oli nomor 1) buat motor matic. Dengan memakai oli ini, motor matic pun akan melaju dengan kencang dan lebih mulus dibadingkan dengan motor matic lain yang tidakmenggunakan Oli Top 1.

Air Asia “ Now Everyone Can Fly “

           *Air Asia menyediakan pelayanan terbaik kesiapapun dengan menyiapkan armada yang banyak  dan pelayanan yang baik, tentunya juga dengan harga yang terjangkau, dengan begitu semua kalangan dapat melakukan perjalanan penerbangan dengan nya

Suzuki  Swift  “ Get it On “

          *Untuk Suzuki Swift yang terbaru menggunakan slogan Get It On karena memang sangat cocok sekali untuk generasi muda sekarang yang modern, kreatif dan dinamis dan juga sangat cocok sekali untuk  kalangan eksekutif muda yang penuh tantangan dalam mencapai karier. Modil sedan keluaran Suzuki Swift ini sangat menarik sekali untuk di coba pada kalangan muda mudi, penawaan yang sangat cocok ini dari : mesin no 1, bahan bakar yang irit , body yang elegant  , sparepart mudah didapat, dan interior yang sangat memuaskan cocok untuk smua kalangan .